Why can’t they be on my page?

S

ome things are so obvious that they stare you in the face. But you, being you, refuse to accept them as such. So, you keep boring people to death and unnecessarily make yourself odious. Last year was a year of self-discovery for me, as I realised I am similarly flawed (and, I must admit, odious) ad nauseam.

Not that it was something new. My wife, of a couple of years shy of four decades, and my son, a hombre of 36, have been telling me the same since the day they met me. The manner of registering the protest and the indignation at my being odious has undergone changes, at times radically, but the content has remained the same.

My son, when he was a week old (that is when we met), started on the path of reminding me of my shortcomings by wailing loudly whenever I spoke, which, over time, has found words that fall shy of admonishment. And she who shouldn’t be named has also honed her tools to keep my mouth under a tight leash!

But the trouble begins when they are not around. I was reading The Difficulty of Being Good by Gurcharan Das. Now that he is perceived to be old (he was then on the wrong side of seventy when he wrote that), the behaviour of his wife and children has changed towards him from being the protected ones to the protectors of him! And he finds it strange as he does find it difficult to discern any behavioural shift in his own existence from what he was before!

I dare say that I found a resonance in his reflections. From my ability to drive to all that I am hasn’t changed. I still find women, especially the ones with minds of their own, more attractive (whether the reverse is true is still a matter of conjecture, though) than men, and I still find men more attractive than women while goofing at the club. But they who have the leash will not concur. Need I really say what their opinion is about it!

There are, of course, differences. I mean, Gurcharan Das is a Harvard alumnus with an enviable track record of successes. I have been a common man with an intolerably mediocre existence. Yet, funnily, he and I still have a common ground when it comes to existential dilemma! That indeed was one happy note to end the year with.